May 20, 2009

Senior Last Will and Testament - 1988

Last week we read what the Class of 1987 left for us in their last will & testament. Today we'll read what some of us tried to pass down to the lower classman at the end of our senior year. We'd been waiting to write our wills ever since we could remember reading others in the school newspaper. The goal here was to be clever and unique, personal and specific... you only get one shot at this, so it'd better be funny. Before you read any further, do you remember what you wrote?

We, the seniors, will the following items and memories upon our graduation…
I, Vicki Ausbrooks, will to Scott Boatright the ability to run from the auditorium to the lunchroom without falling down, and to Marqus Dorn my ability to be cool and immature at the same time.

I, Tammy Carrell, being of sound mind and body, do hereby leave my common sense and, above all, my ability to put two and two together, to Jeni Crosswhite.

I, Jeremy Crosswhite, being of sound mind and body, will to Matthew Adkins the ability to play the piano without moving.

I, Laura Heird, being of sound body and mind, will to all members of the 1988 Junior Class who plan to take Mrs. Cook’s Advanced English IV class the right to wait until the night before research papers are due to get NO sleep.

I, Don Eslick, leave my ability to wait until the last minute to study and to finish the famous research paper to anyone who will take it. Someone please take it!

I, Vandra Williams, being of sound mind and body, will my ability to get through track practice without complaining to Shannon Hooten and my ability to play racquetball to Darrin Theiss.

I, Susie Larkin, will my ability to keep up the spirit of the basketball team at all times to the Lady Jackets of 88-89.

I, Melissa Plummer, hereby leave my ability to tolerate blue Mondays and rainy days the same as any other day to my brother Tim Benfield. Good luck!

I, Jackie Davis, being of sound mind and body, do hereby leave my propane system to the science classes.

I, Jon Paul Anderton, being of sound mind and body leave Michelle Romine the ability to stay out of D-hall.

I, Jason Smith, being of sound mind and body, will a pack of Big Red gum to Justin Gaddis.

I, Rodney Cossey, left my mind somewhere.

I, Marlena Ukno, being of nervous mind and exhausted body, leave all the stress and anxieties of being a senior to the members of the Junior Class.

I, Kevin Sollars, leave my ability to be quiet, kind, and courteous to Clarence Howard.

I, Penny White, being of sound mind and sound body, will my ability to NEVER get into trouble to Marcy Holmes and my brain to Gwen Curtis.

I, Gina McCool, being of unusual mind and strangely clad body, will my ability to dress the way I do to anyone who has the guts (or stupidity). Good luck!

I, Rickey Whitaker, leave my driving record and ability to stay out of trouble for one year to Buffie May.
I, Karen Vanlandingham, leave nothing to anyone because I’m taking it with me!

I, Jamey Black, leave all my torn blue jeans to Chris Campbell, my awesome golf scores for Brent Winston to try to beat, and my shorts over sweats to Mr. Robinson, along with a free driving lesson.

I, Larry Campbell, will my extremely thick and voluptuous hair to Bob Easton.

I, Kim Vailes, of unsound mind, will my brains to the sophomore class to be divided equally among them because they will need all the help they can get to get out of here by 1990.

I, Clif Arnold, will my truck to my dad because after all my wrecks, I’ll never be able to afford insurance again. Now he can make the payments!

I, Dana Oates, being of sound body and mind, will my ability to pass Mrs. Cook’s English class to Bobby Taylor. Good luck because you’ll need it!

I, Phillip Clifford, will my tan to Melissa Caple.

I, Lance Ashley, being of sound mind and body that speaks for itself, will my lack of concern, my ability to procrastinate, and my knack for doing nothing and getting by, to anyone that wants it.

I, Steven Benning, being of sound great mind and awesome body, will my brain to Johnny Nooner so he can stay out of trouble in Mrs. Williams’ class and my King Delbert crown to Mr. Simpson.

I, Andy Mayberry, being of brilliant mind and fantastic body, will my tremendous free-throw shooting ability to Laith Adams, my sportswriting ability to Jamie Gartman, and my full head of hair to Mr. Easton.

I, David Damron, will my ability to shoot on the right goal during a basketball game, and not to make a fool of myself while singing “Joy to the World” in front of the whole school to Lisa Deal.

I, Trent (Mini Shaw) Allen, being of average sized body but bigger than Aaron Wilson, hereby will my ability to shred anyone, anywhere, anytime to my younger brother, Justin (Executive Shaw) Allen, and I will my ability to exclaim, “OH, Yeah,” to Bobby Lee Taylor.

I, Travis Miller, being of unsound mind and body, will my ability to get up early to Wayne Miller, and my ability to survive the ordeal of fighting, kicking, and struggling with Mrs. Cook’s research paper to Speedy Wilkerson, and my grades to the Blivets, Shrons, and Pencil-necks below me.

I, Paula Ferguson, being of semi-sound mind and body, will my title of “Platinum Princess” and my whips and chains to anyone who wishes to take it over.

I, Christi Eggburn, being of sound mind and body, will my good luck to anyone who has all the time and patience to play all the contests in the Arkansas Democrat and the Arkansas Gazette.

No comments:

Post a Comment